Pursue Reconciliation

Matthew 5: 17 – 26

A young insurance salesman had just completed a training seminar in which the attendees were encouraged to strike up conversations with strangers. They were told that it was a good way to introduce themselves to new people and thereby gain new clients.

The young salesman stopped off at a fast-food restaurant for some supper and while standing in line decided to try what he had learned. He started to say something to the man in front of him in line, but didn’t know what to say. Just at that time, he saw a woman sitting at a table in the restaurant that was startlingly ugly.

He leaned over to the fellow in front of him and said, “Did you see that ugly lady sitting over there?” The man replied with anger in his voice, “Sir, that is my wife!”

The young salesman panicked but tried to recover. He said, “No sir. Not that lady.

The one beside her!” The man gritted his teeth and said, “That is my daughter!”

The message this morning is about pursuing reconciliation.

--We all make mistakes and by that we hurt others. Jesus wants us to be mindful

that we need to be diligent to seek reconciliation in all our relationships.

Throughout the Sermon on the Mount there is a common theme: Christ wants

His followers to think and act differently from the world. He wants us to understand that there should be a distinctiveness that sets us apart from everyone else

One of these distinctions should be how we view the Scriptures

--The Bible is not just some antiquated book that teaches things that are irrelevant to

everyday life. Instead, it is vital and efficient for our needs.

Listen to what Jesus says in Mt. 5:17-18 –  “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.  For truly I tell you, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished.

--The Law and the Prophets is a reference to the whole Old Testament

Jesus tells us that He came not to do away with what God has already said and

done in the Old Testament

--Instead, He is the fulfillment of what God has already said and done.

Jesus didn’t come to fix things because things had gotten out of control.

He didn’t come to fix things because God’s plan had failed. He came to fulfill things

and to bring everything full circle.

He came to bring it to its intended purpose, to bring it to fruition.

It has been explained this way: “The apple blossom is fulfilled when it matures into the fruit. When that takes place the blossom falls off. It is not abolished, it is fulfilled.”

Jesus goes on to give a warning in Mt. 5:19 –  Therefore anyone who sets aside one of the least of these commands and teaches others accordingly will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in the kingdom of heaven.

--He follows that warning immediately with some advice and encouragement:

“But whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in

the kingdom of heaven.”

One of the problems in Jesus’ day was that a group of religious scholars referred to

as the Pharisees and the teachers of the law had corrupted God’s message from the

Old Testament.

In their own minds, they had not seen God’s Words as sufficient.

--In doing so, they sought to add to, define, and re-define the message God had

given to His people

They saw the scriptures as a complicated list of do’s and don’t that needed to be

followed explicitly.

Because the Pharisees made understanding God’s instructions so difficult, there

were many in Jesus’ day who thought it too difficult so they just went on with life

doing what they thought was best.

They let the Pharisees and the teachers of the Law be the experts and looked at

them as examples of righteous and godly behavior.

However, there are several times in the gospels where Jesus confronts the

Pharisees and teachers of the law as hypocrites

--they taught God’s law but didn’t live it.

Jesus gives His followers a higher standard

The crowd had to be shocked at His next statement in Mt. 5:20 –

 For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will certainly not enter the kingdom of heaven.

The Pharisees did outward actions and they were consumed with looking right on the outside,

but their hearts were far away from God.

Psalms 19:7-11

The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul;
The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple;
⁸ The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart;
The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes;
⁹ The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever;
The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.
¹⁰ More to be desired are they than gold,
Yea, than much fine gold;
Sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.
¹¹ Moreover by them Your servant is warned,
And in keeping them there is great reward.

AND

Deuteronomy 6:4-6 – ⁴ Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.^[a] 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. ⁶ These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.

The intention of the law in the beginning was to change people’s hearts.

Righteousness begins with the heart, not with outward appearances

God says, “Love the lord your God with all your HEART” and “write these

things on your HEART.”

Like the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, our religious piety can turn people

off from Christ unless it is accompanied with a life that imitates Jesus Christ.

--We are called to an inward change in the heart that manifests itself in outward

behavior.

A certain man planted a rose and watered it faithfully, and before it blossomed, he examined it. He saw the bud that would soon blossom and also the thorns. And he thought, "How can any beautiful flower come from a plant burdened with so many sharp thorns?" Saddened by this thought, he neglected to water the rose, and before it was ready to bloom, it died.

So it is with many people. Within every soul there is a rose. The God-like qualities planted in us at birth grow amid the thorns of our faults. Many of us look at ourselves and see only the thorns, the defects. We despair, thinking that nothing good can possibly come from us. We neglect to water the good within us, and eventually it dies. We never realize our potential.

        Some people do not see the rose within themselves; someone else must show it to them. One of the greatest gifts a person can possess is to be able to reach past the thorns and find the rose within others. This is the characteristic of love, to look at a person, and knowing his faults, recognize the nobility in his soul, and help him realize that he can overcome his faults. If we show him the rose, he will conquer the thorns. Then will he blossom, blooming forth thirty, sixty, a hundred-fold as it is given to him.

        Our duty in this world is to help others by showing them their roses and not their thorns. Only then can we achieve the love we should feel for each other; only then can we bloom in our own garden.

--JESUS teaches us what He expects His followers to do when dealing with others

What makes you angry?

--Is it an insensitive coworker, an incompetent driver, unreasonable demands from a boss, neglect from a spouse, ridicule from family members, or judgmental words from a preacher?

Matthew 5:21-22 – ²¹ “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder,^[a] and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’ ²² But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause^[b] shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Raca!’ shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, ‘You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire.

Now lets understand that in the New Testament there are a couple of occasions where we see Jesus gets very angry.

But what was He angry about?

It was about the dishonoring of the temple, the misuse of a place of worship

Jesus is not teaching that we should never be angry

If that were the case, then God would be guilty of breaking His own command

The Bible clearly talks about the “wrath of God”

Ephesians 4:26, Paul quotes from Psalms 4:4 – “In your anger do not sin.”

--So it is possible to get angry without sinning.

The word Jesus uses here in Mt. 5 is a word that means to be habitually angry.

It’s a mindset in which you harbor anger and you long to get even or do something to a person.

Jesus is talking about non-appropriate anger

Muhammad Ali tells that when he was a child his parents gave him a brand new bicycle. A few days later someone stole it. He was very angry and went looking for the fellow who stole his bike. He ran into a policeman and when Ali told him about the stolen bike, the policeman asked Ali what he was going to do if he caught the boy who stole it. Ali said that he didn’t know. So the policeman took Ali to the gym and began teaching him how to box. Ali said, "To this day I never found my bike, but every time I got in the ring, I’d look across at my opponent and say to myself, “that’s the guy who stole my bike!”

Anger is dangerous.

It can decimate relationships, destroy a friendship, and negatively affect the workplace.

Christ’s followers are to think and act differently and distinctively than others

Maybe you’re angry today.

Maybe you were abused physically as a child.

Maybe you were let go from a job unfairly or passed over for a promotion you deserved.

Maybe you are scarred by a church feud in the past.

Maybe you are being persecuted for your beliefs.

Maybe you’ve been hurt by someone in your family.

Any number of things can drive us to anger.

We need to work in our life at diffusing anger.

Again we read in Eph. 4:26-27 – “In your anger do not sin, Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold.”

--Solomon said, in Prov. 25: 21-22;

“If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty,

give him water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will

reward you.”

ways to release your anger:

1.) Count to ten

2.) Talk to a close friend

--Don’t gossip and don’t talk to someone who will gossip about the situation

3). If you need to, seek counseling.

4). Write a letter to the person you’re angry with and then to tear it up.

5). I saved the most important step for last: PRAY

We need to transfer our anger over to God and allow Him to help us deal with it.

The Bible says that The Fruit of the Spirit is self-control.

When you boil it all down to the core, the cause of most anger is wounded pride.

Not only should you pray about the situation and yourself, but also pray for the person you

are angry with.

--It’s really difficult to have an unhealthy anger at someone you’re praying for on a

consistent basis

A number of years ago a man named Robert Coles told a story of a girl who had

learned to pray for those who were hostile to her. Coles was in New Orleans in 1960 when a

federal judge ruled that the city schools must be integrated.

A 6-year-old girl named Ruby Bridges was the only African-American child to attend the

William T. Frantz School. Every day for weeks as she entered and left the building, a mob

would stand outside to scream at her and threaten her. They shook their fists, shouted

obscenities, and threatened to kill her.

One day her teacher saw her lips moving as she walked through the crowd, flanked by

burly federal marshals. When the teacher told Coles about it, he asked Ruby if she was talking

to the people. “I wasn’t talking to them,” she replied. “I was just saying a prayer for them”

Coles asked her, “Why do you do that?” Bridges replied, “Because they need praying for.”

As Christ-followers, we need to be willing to control our tongues

If we don’t deal with anger, it will come out in our speech.

Do you see how anger and speech go hand in hand?

--Anger can lead to words of pain and hurt.

James 3:5-6 – ⁵ Even so the tongue is a little member and boasts great things.

See how great a forest a little fire kindles! ⁶ And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.

If you’re carrying a cup of coffee and someone bumps into you, what happens?

--The coffee spills out over the lip of the cup.

The same thing happens in our everyday life when we get jostled and bumped through the adversity we face.

--If our anger is bubbling just below the surface, it spills out at the least little thing

Usually when we get bumped it spills out over our lips and we say things that we shouldn’t and we say things we wish we could take back.

RECONCILE YOUR DIFFERENCES

--Matthew 5:23-24 – “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.”

Most people make the connection with our culture and understand this to mean that if you are coming to worship and you are at odds with someone, try to address that issue before you worship.

If you are at odds with another Christian and you know it’s time for communion, maybe the best thing you could do is to somehow make contact with that individual and even wait on taking communion until you have that matter settled.

You see, your effort to reconcile may not need to be some elaborate time-consuming one-hour

appointment that is scheduled.

--It may be as simple as a gracious handshake or a one-line apology.

In other situations where the hurt has gone on for years, and the pain runs deeply, it may involve

sitting down and processing the situation together at great length.

The reconciliation effort should depend on the offense.

--There isn’t one pat formula to follow, so be wise, as it will be different in each circumstance.

1. The Bible warns us that we cannot be on good terms with God when we are on bad terms with

other people

--1 John 4:20 – “If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who

does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.”

The problem is, we tend to like retaliation more than reconciliation.

Paul says in Ephesians 4:3, “Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of

peace.”

Jesus said in Matthew 6:15; “But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive

your sins.”

Romans 12:18: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

CONCLUSION: A. Self-control instead of anger doesn’t come very naturally for us.

--Kind words instead of belittling speech seem foreign to us. Even our efforts at

reconciliation is awkward at best.

Whether it’s your speech that has gotten you in trouble or your temper, mending fences

in your family, or staying out of court, we can try to do it on the outside.

--But we won’t be very successful

The only way it will truly take place is if we change on the inside.

--That only comes when Christ changes us and transforms us.

A Sunday school teacher asked her class if they could give Bible examples of anyone making a bad bargain. The first said, "Esau made a bad bargain when he sold his birthright for a mess of pottage". Another said, "Judas made a bad bargain when he sold Jesus for 30 pieces of silver". A third said, “Ananias and Sapphira made a bad bargain when they lied about the price of their land". A fourth said, “Jesus said it is a bad bargain when a man gains the whole world and loses his own soul". We might add another to the above list by observing that it is a bad bargain for you and me to trade our hope of heaven for the pleasures, riches, power and glory of this world. Jesus was shown all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time and told he could have all these if he bowed down to Satan. Jesus knew that would be a bad bargain.

What kinds of bargains do we make?

Do we trade the worship time for a few hours of sleep?

Do we trade Christian service for idle pleasures?

Let us not trade Heaven for anything!

--Do you need to reconcile with God this evening?